Dear Sean:

Hi! It’s your mother! You’re doing okay, right? I know we don’t have a lot of money but if you’re feeling suicidal we’ll figure out a way to get you into therapy. How’s the weather in New York? Your father and I are so proud of you. Moving to the big city to chase your dreams of doing stand up comedy. We hope you have so much fun until you run out of money and have to move back in with us.

I mean New York isn’t for everyone. You could always go to San Francisco and stay with your aunt. Or London. I know your guy Bill Hicks was big over there. Maybe you could look into that, see if you can get some gigs overseas. Listen to me, I could be like your mother and your agent! As your agent I have to advise you to pursue other options besides comedy.

I mean comedy isn’t for everyone. Have you thought about graduate school? You could be an architect. I read an article recently that says there are lots of great jobs for them. Imagine making such beautiful buildings and structures. Did you hear about that woman in Seattle who hung herself? She was a university student, your age probably. I don’t think she was studying architecture.

I mean being alive isn’t for everyone. But you, definitely stay alive! Really, are you feeling okay? You’ll tell me if you’re not, right? I know we have a family history of depression. You probably thought I was very sane and well adjusted your entire life. I worked very hard to hide it from you because I wanted you to have a normal childhood. I guess you never really had any friends or got a girlfriend so it didn’t make much difference.

Well, things are fine around the house. Your cat is dead so I got my furniture repaired.  Your father and brother send their love. I know we’re all going to be so proud of you when you become an architect.

P.S. Please don’t kill yourself.

Love, Mom